Control Issues

In a last-ditch attempt to find some control over my life, I am forcing myself to face stuff that I keep putting off.

Being an eBay and Etsy seller, I have "stuff". Much of it is not mine but things acquired from others and the goal was to flip them online in order to help pay the bills. It has been slow going.

I have a rule. It lists for 4 months or 3 auction runs on eBay and if it doesn't sell- it gets tossed or donated.

I have written before about my fear of hoarding and this is just one of the ways that I keep mindful.

Yes, you guessed it- I am a little nutty. You would be too if you had spent the last 3+ years a virtual prisoner in your home.

After losing my job back in 2008 I have struggled with several serious health issues, lost 2 cars due to their age, had a few temporary jobs and recently had to give up my car that I love when we became a one-car family. With no job outside the home, no car and not many places to walk to (and what would I do once I got there?) I am pretty much homebound 24/7.

I still am looking for income opportunities; it is way more of a challenge now without transportation. But I am so NOT complaining. Being unemployed and having such a hard time getting re-employed has given me the opportunity to explore what else is out there.

So I do what I can (trying to keep that optimistic attitude) and I am determined to take back some control of my life.

As I go through the boxes of "stuff" in my basement and try to determine what (if anything) will earn a few dollars, I start to get overwhelmed.


Once the sense of panic builds, I remove myself from the area. I need to breathe.

Part of my issue with my basement is that the memory of the Hurricane is still fresh in my mind. A few days without power and lots of rain, filled my basement and unfortunately we lost a lot of stuff. Good stuff. Air conditioners, homemade Halloween costumes, and other stuff had to be thrown away after sitting in flood waters for days. It was a nightmare. Others did have it worse though...I am grateful we still have a home.

Maybe that is what adds to my fears of suddenly losing my mind and becoming a hoarder. I don't know. So after a break I am able to get back to the business of getting organized. It feels good to purge.

I invite you to look me up on eBay (PMBenfield) and visit my etsy shops. (TreasuresByMimi and P Benfield Designs)

No comments:

Post a Comment